For those of you who don’t know, I am a certified makeup artist, and in my certification curriculum was an Intro to SFX class.
I learn all of the cool shit, like zombie makeup, burn makeup, injuries, etc., but I also learned incredibly useful things like bone structure, and how to re-create it, and how to properly use it for correction makeup.
So here is a look that I created, and that I’m incredibly proud of. It’s been a really long time since I’ve done any true SFX makeup, and was able to use makeup that I already had.
It feels profoundly liberating to be able to create art like this again. I’m so grateful.
The only not so fun part is clean-up. My sink looked like a crime scene, and I now have red stained rags, but it was so, so beyond worth it.
For the first time in a long time, I feel a creative shift in my life, and I am so deeply grateful.
Thank you so much for your time; I am grateful.
Good read on fluffing up your blog.
Some of my best friends are anonymous But that doesn’t increase their subscriber counts Not so long ago, from an entirely personal perspective, I was…Tips for bloggers #5: Leverage your identity
Thank you in advance for sleep, and for my body feeling rested. Thank you in advance for good health, and no seizures because of the Houston heat.
Thank you in advance for financial prosperity, million dollar ideas, business growth, and connections. I’m grateful to have a job, and I’m grateful for the warm welcome back into my community.
Thank you in advance for pulling myself out of my tiny hole called home, and embracing fashion, creativity, and community.
Thank you in advance for love, empathy, kindness, and support. I’m grateful for my friends, my small circle of acquaintances, and my family.
I’m grateful for being a strong woman with a presence. Thank you in advance for stepping into my power, letting go of fear, and allowing my success speak to the shitty people that have been in my life, rather than feeling the need to justify my actions.
Thank you in advance for interesting, successful research, which will lead to opportunities for papers and consulting gigs.
Thank you in advance for diversifying my income, and for working smarter, not harder.
I am grateful for my power of observation, my wit, analytical skills, and my ability to see things others miss.
Thank you in advance for a long, healthy life, and body, please forgive me for being such an ass hole to you. We need a solution to this chronic pain, but eating healthy is hard (lolol).
Thank you in advance for an amazing week!
Thank you in advance for your time.
Thank you in advance for finishing my current book. What did it teach me? How does it serve me? How can I implement what serves me into my life?
Thank you in advance for starting a fresh book and engrossing myself in it.
Thank you in advance for feeling more at home on my blog, and for publishing 3 times this week.
Thank you in advance for 10 likes this week.
Thank you in advance for proactive laziness.
Thank you in advance for good health for Patrick, the babies and and I.
Thank you in advance for clarity and getting my ass into gear. Thank you in advance for creating for setting my priorities and creating an actionable plan by planning backwards.
Thank you in advance for job call backs.
Thank you in advance for new glasses.
Thank you in advance for financial prosperity.
Remember: I am in exactly the right place at every moment. Don’t lose faith.
We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master. -Ernest Hemingway (1899 – 1961), New York Journal, 1961 Shared wisdom My poet-…No one ever becomes a master
We are all professional students. Learn to wear that hat with pride. Learning is never finished.
Sometimes, the truth is so much worse than you think, but despite the sheer amount of pain that it causes can be the key to setting you free. What they say is true: Freedom isn’t free.
Living in silence is not living; it’s oppression and fear.
Reaching out to find an answer is better than not ever knowing. Knowledge is power, and I am powerful.
When things are hard, go to your girlfriends and talk some mad smack, and then work through it. It’s the unwritten Burn Book, and it is magical.
Stop looking allowing people from your past take away from the now. You can’t take it back, and you didn’t know.
You are so much stronger than you think.
Finally, the sun will keep shining, time will keep moving, and as long as I take the time to breathe, I’m going to be okay.
I am in exactly the right place at every moment.
I give myself permission to invest time into myself every day. I am gifting myself with rest, patience, love, and nourishment.
Thank you in advance for emotional healing, for listening to my needs, and a fresh start.
The opposite of love is not hate, it’s indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it’s indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, …The opposite of life
This so spot on. Indifference, is indeed, a killer.
My name is Emily Autumn. As of writing this, I am 29 years old, and depending on who you ask in 10 years, I might still be 29. I am currently a human struggling to keep my head above water on bad days and scraping by on the good days. I say intentionally because I am working on getting through my
mid-life crisis “spiritual awakening”. I’m hoping that if I say that phrase enough times that I’ll feel more inclined to believe it.
My life has been very complicated since I was born. I was born to a non-practicing Mormon mother with a big mouth and a non-practicing Muslim father, with an even bigger temper. They both experienced and witnessed a lot of abuse and other horrible events that brought them to each other and it was volatile from the start. And then I came along and we lived happily ever after. lol jk.
In a lot of ways, I had an ideal childhood: two parents that loved me and doted on me, we lived in an okay house in an okay neighborhood, I had really rad birthday parties and we took vacations to Disneyland (not World, there’s a difference) and Turkey. I went to an okay school where my mom was a room mother and my class always had the most elaborate parties for all of the holidays. I was even a girl scout and got to go camping and sell cookies and my mom was one of the den mothers. On the outside, we looked like a relatively normal, middle class family.
I lived a privileged life in a lot of ways, but the inner turmoil of my parents marriage, and subsequent divorce was a hefty price to pay for all of the glamorous things that I grew up with.
As it turns out, the old expression “All that glitters is not gold” was a very appropriate statement for my family. Behind the scenes, there was tension, anger, an eating disorder, verbal abuse and many attempts at physical abuse.
My father came from a very abusive family. My mother came was the product of an affair that my grandmother didn’t know she was having, and when my biological grandfather left her, she turned to alcohol. My mother grew up in a very unstable home and was sent to live with an angel for awhile, but we just called her Meme. My dad worked hard to make a living for my mom and I, and that’s what my mother needed: stability.
I grew up “the perfect child”; my mother made sure of it, no matter how she had to get me there. I had the perfectly styled hair, perfectly cute outfits with accessories to match, perfect play dates, perfect reading, perfect writing, and most importantly, I was to behave perfectly. It was all peachy and perfect (put lots of emphasis on those P’s).
So now, as an adult, I’ve realized that my early life how fucked up things really were in my house as an adult. I remember walking into the living room in the middle of the night to my parents fighting, and my mother threw a phone at my dad. I don’t remember this, but I allegedly walked in on my father raising his hand to my mom like he was going to slap her, and when he saw me, he pulled his hand away.
I also remember feeling like I had to walk on egg shells or else face the corner or face the hand to my bottom. I remember not emptying the trash can and my mother walking in and saying that she was disappointed in me and that she didn’t want to speak to me for awhile.
And I remember feeling unappreciated and unvalued by both of my parents sometimes.
So what’s the point of telling you all of this? You’re probably thinking, “Bitch, I thought this was a sex blog. Where’s the juicy shit?” Well unfortunately, before we can get to the good shit, we have to wade through the bad shit: the deep pit of shame of just being alive sometimes, or the struggle to just put one foot in front of the other to make it through the day. I promise that the good, juicy shit is coming soon (lol coming).
So let’s regroup after all the heavy shit at the beginning and kind of start over.
Hi, my name is Emily Autumn. That is not my legal name, it is my chosen name. All of the hard experiences in my life have given me the wisdom to know that you don’t have to settle for the things you’re given, you can build your own identity from scratch. I have struggled with an eating disorder, alcohol and boys. I used to feel a deep sense of shame from my experiences because I thought that it made me broken and unlovable, but I have come to the understanding that being broken just means that you have the opportunity to replace some of the old pieces dull pieces with beautiful ones and create a stained glass window.
I am currently studying psychology at the University of Houston. I want to pursue sex therapy, but I also want to study it. I want to study the relationship between sex and shame and change the conversation; I want to empower women with their sexuality, but also teach them to be kinder to themselves. I want to teach men that it’s okay to feel emotions and that it’s okay to cry and that it’s not shameful. And I want to teach men and women how to love themselves more so that they can be better partners, better parents, better listeners and better to themselves; because in my journey, thanks to some guidance from Brene Brown ( #noticemebrenebrown #shameless ) that you can’t give people something that you don’t have, and if you can’t be kind to yourself, you can’t be kind to others.
Just to be clear, this did not happen over night. My journey started roughly 4 years ago and it’s been mostly uphill. But in those 4 years, I have learned patience, kindness and thoughtfulness along the way, so I am eternally grateful for all of the terrible things that have happened in my life.
I am confident, that together, we can work through the kinks together and learn to face the world in a more confident and thoughtful way.
Until next time, make good choices and don’t have sex or you’ll get pregnant and die (just kidding, but seriously, have safe sex).