A Story About Shame, Sex, Mental Health, and Epilepsy
I'm a Psychology Undergrad at the University of Houston. I live with epilepsy; it has completely changed the way I live my life. I study shame and sexuality and am an advocate for sex positivity, epilepsy, and those without a voice.
My goal is to educate people on shame, sex, tolerance, epilepsy, mental health, makeup, and how to love yourself first.
I have been experiencing this off and on since the beginning of the Pandemic; my poor snooze button is worn out. Side note, I think it’s morbidly funny that “pandemic” is a new part of our daily vocab.
Some days it doesn’t even feel worth it to get out of bed, since at the end of the day, we’re not that far from it in the first place. I find myself working from bed more and more, and shortly after, sprawled out and probably napping.
I have a whole new respect for stay-at-home parents and people working from home before this bull shit begun. How do you do it?
What kind of things can I implement to make me get out of bed (and making it doesn’t help)?
I started this journey in 2019, and since then, I have had my heart and life shattered, I have quietly sorted out most of the pieces, put them back together, only to have my heart shattered again. Then, it felt as if the pieces had been stolen by The Pandemic.
This time, organizing the pieces will still be painful, but putting them back together will be simpler, because I know how to better organize and fit them into place, delicately and deliberately. I am in exactly the right place at every moment.
I am loved.
I am grateful.
I am wise.
I am fierce.
I am resilient.
I am empowered.
I am Enough.
I am a woman that owns my sexuality.
I am the daughter of domestic abuse.
I am a partner, and a soul mate, and a lover.
I am worthy of love and belonging.
I am a dreamer in a rigid world.
I am the woman your mother warned you about; the one that stands her ground, and the star peg in the round hole.
Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you would have noticed a bunch of shit happening in the world. Covid has effected myself and so many others in a lot of ways.
For me personally, thankfully I have not gotten sick, or personally know someone who has gotten sick or passed away because of the virus. My mental health, however, is a different story.
It started deteriorating about a month into quarantine. There are some days that I just can’t get out of bed, other days, my OCD is so bad that I can’t think because of intrusive thoughts and anxiety.
I know I promised a piece on erectile dySfunction, and I am working on it, it’s taken me so much longer than I could have anticipated because of my mental health.
I just want to say a very warm thank you for all of your support and patience while I get shit under control. I am profoundly grateful for the community I am building and look forward to start posting again soon.
Stay safe, make good choices, or just don’t get caught making bad ones.